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27 June 2006
M.
M. was my biggest failure this year I guess.
Not in terms of teaching... just merely in terms of communicating, which is the basic task of a teacher. Talking to your pupils, finding the right way to do it. It’s hard; I guess it takes some time. Should I privilege dialogue, above all? But what does it mean? Should I be more strict? Can I really talk to them? Can they share? Are they ready to open up? Is it my job to listen to them? How far should I go?
I often restrained myself. I forced myself not to say too much, just trying to get to know them enough to have a good working atmosphere. Tried to see if there were any problems; failed to see them.
But I saw M. had a problem. Not a big one. He was just fed up with school I guess. He was in the middle of a crisis, wondering where to go and why.
He had this very nonchalant attitude, not caring about anything, talking like a baby, smoking weed (and stopping when realizing that we started to become aware). It was just all nonsense to me. I saw distress. And I also saw stupidity. Not in the wrong sense. Just teenage-like stupidity you know.
I talked to him many times, gently first, then tried a more severe way. Didn’t work. He never said anything. Never expressed himself other than negatively.
I tried to help him out first, being behind him during the exercises to encourage him. Then he gave up. The tests started to be really bad. I tried to hold on it, to keep encouraging him but I think I also partly gave up when I saw there was strictly no response.
As a young teacher, you believe you can make a difference. You have all those big ideas you know. I guess it's legitimate. Well, I still have them fortunately. M. made me wonder for sure but he didn't shake my beliefs.
He left as he came. In between the two, I’m wondering what happened in his mind. I wonder if my class left any mark on him; I wonder how he’ll remember me.
I hope he will become someone good. I hope he will grow up and find his place in the world. I won’t be there to see it.
That reminds me of something that one of our teachers at the IUFM said: “you plant seeds all the time when you’re a teacher. But you’ll never see the plants grow. That’s the frustration of our job.”
22:55 Posted in Blog | Permalink | Comments (7) | Email this | Tags: communication, teenager
Comments
Comme quoi ils disent pas que des conneries à l'iufm. A mon avis (et il ne concerne que moi), je ne peux pas NE PAS jouer sur le conatif (tout ce qui touche à l'émotif) avec mes élèves. Je ne joue pas un jeu, je ne suis pas une actrice. Je suis simplement moi-même. Et comme dans la vie je m'intéresse aux gens ben là je m'intéresse à eux. Je leur dis que je suis là pour les écouter, les aider et quitte à pas noter un contrôle où je sens que l'élève n'est pas là dans sa tête, ben je le fais. Je m'en fous de ce que diront les autres profs mais pour moi une vraie pédagogie de l'encouragement est nécessaire avec des élèves en échec.
Bon courage pour les années à venir et ne lâche pas le morceau. Les élèves ont besoin qu'on s'intéresse à eux et qu'on ne soit pas toujours dans le jugement et les notes.
emy ;)
Posted by: emyandthepeanut | 28 June 2006
Nous avons tous nos échecs, moi j'ai découvert une situation problématique un peu tard ds l'année, mais le garçon redouble ds ma classe. Je vais y travailler dès septembre !
Posted by: educnat | 01 July 2006
Where have you gone ?
Posted by: educnat | 06 July 2006
I was in the region of Paris to look for a new flat. I am resting at my parents' now (and I do need rest!!!). I will be back online in two weeks approximately.
But thanks for asking!!! ;-)
Posted by: missteacher | 07 July 2006
One more week !
Enjoy yourself !
Posted by: educnat | 14 July 2006
For me the key to reaching students, especially the difficult ones is to be yourself. Of course this is a cliche, but essentially what I mean is no bullshit, no being extra nice or extra mean. The problem ones, the ones that brood, or are troubled will see through any fake attempt to reach them. It can never be a failure if you don't fake it. There are always those that you just can't get to. I mean imagine how Dubya's teachers feel.
Oh, and weed is a non-countable noun, as in 'A friend with weed is a friend indeed.' ;-)
Posted by: b. | 25 July 2006
Thanks B. for your comment. I really appreciate seeing you there. It's been so long! But it feels good to read you.
Feel free to correct any mistake you see because, although I'm an English teacher, I'm not a native speaker and my English is far from perfect.
Posted by: missteacher | 25 July 2006